[Every time Jack is apprehensive about drawing Genji deeper into his activities, he remembers everything they went through together as part of COST. Still, working in tandem with someone not Ana is taking some getting used to. He alternately finds himself thankful for Genji’s presence and wanting to be alone, but when Ana makes contact and says she needs more time, jack surprises himself when he feels glad to have someone else in the empty safe house.]
No, she says it’s safer if she finishes it alone.
[Jack can’t help but worry, because he’s already lost Ana once and he’s extremely not keen on having it happen again, but he also knows that she can take care of herself. At a certain point, there’s nothing he can do but trust her abilities and hope she comes home safe.
It’s nice, he has to admit, to not be alone with his thoughts for once.]
[ Genji understands that there are certain missions where it's better to take them on solo for the sake of not blowing one's cover or attracting too much attention. Genji knows how to be silent and unobtrusive, cyborg or not, so he would like to think that he could assist Ana without undoing the work she's already put in, but...
If Jack insists, then he'll take his word on it.
Jack isn't one to show emotion these days (or ever, in some ways), but Genji has to assume that he's concerned for Captain Amari. He'd already thought her dead the one time, and so it can't be easy to have her gone for so many days. If he can distract him from that, then he'd like to. ]
No, not at all. [ Genji shakes his head, sheathing his wakizashi to give attention to his katana next. Much as he might like to see Ana again, he's learned patience. ] Will we be staying here or moving on to a new location?
[ He knows it's generally not a good idea to stay in one spot too long, but Jack and Ana also seem to have established themselves here. He'll accept either answer that Jack gives him. ]
[For better or worse. Jack is starting to get antsy, which he's sure that Genji has noticed, despite his best efforts not to betray anything. All the time they spent together as part of COST has thoroughly negated his ability to keep a straight face.
They're used to each other, he's starting to realize.]
I'll let you know if that changes. Now all that's left is to figure out how to spend the time.
[ For now, is the caveat that Jack offers. Genji's become used to staying in one location after establishing himself at the monastery, but he's also used to drifting from place to place. He'll be able to adapt either way, and he hopes he can serve as some kind of grounding presence in Ana's absence.
When Jack implies a question, Genji tilts his head to one side, mildly surprised that he's being polled on what their next move should be. Consistent strikes against Talon seems to be a given, so Jack must mean outside of that.
[They both know by now that Jack doesn’t do well when he’s bored, and this is most certainly a scenario where that might end up being the case. There are only so many low-level thugs they can deal with while Ana is away, so finding another way to pass the time is going to be vital.
That said, he’s sort of unsure of Genji’s suggestion, even though he knows beggars can’t really be choosers.]
[ Genji can't hold back a laugh, something that reverberates in his throat, and he removes his hand from his sword in order to hold a finger up in the air. There's something almost teacherly in his tone when he responds, though he's really just mimicking a certain omnic. ]
You realize that is the whole point of practicing, do you not?
[ At least in Genji's case he'd had lessons on mediation even as a child, though he hadn't always paid close attention to them. He'd only truly learned under Zenyatta's tutelage, but that makes him well-equipped to pass the knowledge on now. ]
Yeah, well, I don't really want to trouble you with my issues.
[Of which he has a lot, to the point where he thinks trying to meditate with Genji might be an exercise in futility. They have a lot of time for this right now, but he still doesn't want to waste anyone's time. This might be a losing battle, but he's fairly certain that Genji will see that Jack is going to be tough to crack.]
Too much on my mind.
[He's fairly certain he doesn't need to tell Genji that.]
Having too much on your mind is the exact reason that meditation would be good for you, Jack.
[ The stubbornness of Jack Morrison is truly something to behold. Genji has lost count of how many times he's had to engage in arguments like this since he started staying here, and while it's become a point of frustration, he's doing his best to remain patient and understanding. To be like Zenyatta, even though he's not nearly as good at it.
Still, he can rely on his own experience to try and get through to Jack, and that's exactly what he does. After letting out some of his aggravation through an exhale, he turns his attention back to Jack and bares a small bit of his soul. ]
When I first came across Master Zenyatta, I also had much on my mind. I also had issues, as you call them. I was not at peace with myself. I was angry all the time. I could not accept my own body, and it made me lash out at anyone near me. I had not yet forgiven my brother, and thoughts of revenge plagued me every day. Meditation was... only the first step.
[ He wants to help. That is all. He only hopes Jack can see how genuine he is in that desire. ]
[Jack has too much on his mind to effectively mediate, but meditation is what will get all of it off his mind? He generally thinks of himself as kind of a tough nut to crack, and he doubts this will be an exception.
But it’s not like he has anything better to do. He knows that Genji’s “master”, as he describes him, must’ve had some kind of positive effect on him—the Genji he met in COST is certainly not the angry, tormented cyborg he once knew in Overwatch. So maybe there’s something to all this after all, though Genji seems to be describing a long, arduous path of personal growth, one that Jack isn’t sure he can commit to when there’s so much else to get done.]
[ Genji doesn't see what's counter-intuitive about it, but he can also understand how someone who isn't familiar with the basic concepts behind meditation might feel that way. Jack isn't so different from how Genji had once been as a petulant child on the Shimada compound.
But it isn't much of a surprise that Jack wishes to know more about Zenyatta. Genji recognizes that this is a way for Jack to get the subject off of him, and it ultimately won't work, but he'll humor him for now. ]
Yes, he did.
[ He bobs his head, a brief nod. ]
I owe him much. My life, even. Were it not for him, I wouldn't be the man I am today. If I can pass on anything he did for me to you in turn, I'd be glad for it.
[ But Jack has to meet him if not in the middle, then at least a short way down the road. ]
[Jack would much rather know more about Zenyatta than he would try to meditate, so he'll keep the conversation on that for now. They'd spoken a little about him in COST, enough for Jack to know that he's largely responsible for Genji, well, chilling the heck out, but there are still lots of blanks that haven't been filled in yet.]
Where is he now?
[Jack is loath to bring another unrelated party into this, but it seems strange to him that Genji would choose to seek Jack out instead of, presumably, continuing to travel with Zenyatta.]
[ There's a pause as Genji considers what Jack might do or say if Zenyatta was aware of his exact whereabouts, even though that's not the case. While Genji left Blackwatch years ago, there are habits that have stuck with him. Giving exact locations to anyone is generally not a good idea. ]
No, he's still in Nepal for now. He's aware that I had a journey to take, and loose ends to tie up, but none of the exact details.
[ Genji will ultimately return to Zenyatta and tell him all about COST and what he experienced with them, but it had important to him to track Jack down first. ]
[Jack doubts that Zenyatta knows exactly where Genji is (i.e. the exact location of this safe house), but he finds it hard to believe that he wasn’t given an approximate location. Of course, it’s silly to think that the omnic monk might someday show up on his doorstep, but Jack doesn’t exactly want word of his not-death getting out.
But these are silly, paranoid thoughts. He tries to shake them off.]
As long as he doesn’t come looking.
[Jack offers Genji something of a lopsided grin, an attempt to play it off as a joke, even if there are real anxieties underneath it.]
[ Genji had already made a guess at why Jack was asking all of these questions to begin with, and it turns out he'd been completely accurate. The more people who knew that he was still alive and running around, the greater the risk that the information would spread. It's a valid concern, but Zenyatta would never go running his mouth off to anyone. ]
While I can hardly control what he does, I doubt he would come after me without making some kind of contact first. You can rest easy.
[ As wise as Zenyatta is, he hasn't had much experience in the larger world. He doesn't have the kind of street smarts that would allow him to track the two of them to this location, even if that was his wish.
At the question, Genji shakes his head. ]
Not yet, though I'd like to. Telling someone else about it would allow it to feel less like a dream, I think.
[He really has no choice but to believe Genji, but he supposes it’s all beside the point anyway. The point is that now they’re talking about COST, which is simultaneously relieving and not. It’s good to have someone who shares the experience, but having been pulled away from his own world once, a part of Jack will always be wondering if it will happen again.
He sighs a little, scrubbing a hand through his hair, betraying that slight apprehension.]
I thought it was a dream, when I got back.
[Sometimes he wishes it was. He thinks sometimes he’s better off not knowing about COST, the Regency…any of it.]
[ Genji also feels some measure of relief that he's not somehow the only one who remembers, that he can compare notes about this shared experience that most of the people of this world could never truly comprehend or believe.
Zenyatta would. He knows that deep into his bones (what's left of them). But Zenyatta isn't like most people.
A pause, and Genji studies Jack's face with a hint more interest. ]
[Jack nods, and what goes unsaid is that it’s nice to have someone who implicitly understands. It’s not that he thinks Ana wouldn’t, it’s just that he imagines there’s going to be a lot of convincing her involved, given that the whole thing sounds completely crazy. She’d probably be deeply concerned, to say the least.]
Ana already thinks I’m crazy.
[For his crusade against Talon, which often feels less like making progress and more like a dog chasing a car. Even Jack doesn’t know what he’ll do when he finds what he needs. Sometimes it feels like Ana is coming along out of pity, more than anything. A last-ditch effort to keep him from killing himself, even as he drags them further and further past the point of no return. To say he feels guilty about it is an understatement—he can’t, in good conscience, burden her with anything else.]
[ It sounds like there's some manner of story behind that comment. Ana thinks that Jack is crazy, and maybe that's because he is, to some extent. Genji will see more of their dynamic when she returns, he's sure, but he imagines it's shifted from how it had been back during Overwatch's heyday.
Granted, most people would hear something like "I got kidnapped to fight in a galactic time-traveling war" and assume the story-teller had lost some of their grip on their sanity. There was an implicit trust between Jack and Ana that Genji had assumed would overwrite that, but again, it's possible things have changed. ]
I can help. [ There's a smile in his voice, hidden under the ever-present metallic hum. ] If both of us are telling her the same thing, I think it would be more difficult for her to write it off, don't you?
[He knows that Genji is trying to be encouraging, though he's not convinced that telling her is the best idea when they have so much else to worry about.]
She'll just think we're both crazy.
[Though that part is said as a joke. It would certainly give her a moment of pause, if the two of them sat her down and told the same story, though he's not sure if she'd ever fully believe it. If it hadn't happened to him, he's not sure he would believe it either.]
[ It is meant to be a joke, or at least Genji is fairly certain that's the case (with Jack it can be difficult to tell), but he wonders. Surely if both of them told the same story it would make Ana at least consider the possibility, but it's ultimately a moot point for now. He'll keep the secret if that's what Jack wants. ]
If that's what you wish, then I will abide by that.
[ Genji lets out a long sigh and then stretches his arms up into the air, working the kinks out of both his organic and synthetic parts. The work on his sword is done, so he sheathes it. ]
Do you wonder sometimes? What those people we met through COST are doing now.
[ It's a strange thing, knowing that there's very little chance they'll see any of them again. ]
[Perhaps in earlier years, he might not be so confident in Genji’s ability to keep something secret, especially from Ana, but he hopes their shared experience means they have a particularly unique bond. Jack feels silly for thinking of it as a bond, but that’s what it is, isn’t it? He takes a long moment to look Genji up and down, as if assessing their newfound friendship (???) for the first time.
He catches himself staring and turns away again, finding a particularly interesting spot on the floor.]
Sometimes.
[He does his best not to focus on it, because he’s back to his own mission.]
[ With the way that Jack's looking at him, Genji has to fight the urge to look himself over to see if there might be something out of place. He's used to being stared at, honestly, but he wouldn't expect it from someone like Jack who's used to his cyborg form.
He frowns to himself, not sure what that just was, but the conversation moves on before he can decide whether or not it would be wise to comment on it.
At the question he lets out a long sigh. While he would like to be hopeful, he realizes there's no point in giving Jack anything other than the honest truth. He leans back on his hands and crosses his legs before answering. ]
Only if COST were to recruit all of us again. It seems unlikely that anyone would be able to find their way to this world at the correct time. Or that we could do the same.
[ The entire experience will fade away into some odd chapter of their respective histories, an excursion that would be almost impossible to describe to anyone who hadn't experienced it themselves. ]
[Jack's thoughts are very similar--that with no way of even communicating with COST, they're never going to see or hear from any of them again. That's for the best, he thinks, though it's going to be difficult to get it out of his head. Perhaps Genji feels the same.]
Not much point in dwelling on it.
[Though of course that's easier said than done, given the fact that COST itself expanded his worldview to include entire universes and infinite timelines. Not something he can shake off very easily.]
[ Not much point in dwelling on it, perhaps, but they are only human and Genji doesn't think that he can set the experience aside so easily. Nor does he want to, necessarily. ]
I don't believe that forgetting it ever happened is the correct path. It happened to us and affected us, and there's nothing wrong with thinking of those people we met and befriended during that time.
[ Genji glances up from his lap to watch Jack once he finishes speaking. He suspects that Jack will claim he didn't befriend anyone, that it had all been professional, but that seems doubtful. Even just using the two of them as an example, that time with COST forged a closer bond between them, didn't it? Genji feels that it did, and the sheer fact that Jack has let him stay here says a lot. ]
[He's not going to admit that anyone there was a friend, and of course he isn't going to just forget everything that happened, but he knows that he easily gets bogged down in the past. Perhaps this is just his way of resolving to move forward.]
It's just tough getting back to business here, while all that's on my mind.
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No, she says it’s safer if she finishes it alone.
[Jack can’t help but worry, because he’s already lost Ana once and he’s extremely not keen on having it happen again, but he also knows that she can take care of herself. At a certain point, there’s nothing he can do but trust her abilities and hope she comes home safe.
It’s nice, he has to admit, to not be alone with his thoughts for once.]
You don’t mind, right?
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If Jack insists, then he'll take his word on it.
Jack isn't one to show emotion these days (or ever, in some ways), but Genji has to assume that he's concerned for Captain Amari. He'd already thought her dead the one time, and so it can't be easy to have her gone for so many days. If he can distract him from that, then he'd like to. ]
No, not at all. [ Genji shakes his head, sheathing his wakizashi to give attention to his katana next. Much as he might like to see Ana again, he's learned patience. ] Will we be staying here or moving on to a new location?
[ He knows it's generally not a good idea to stay in one spot too long, but Jack and Ana also seem to have established themselves here. He'll accept either answer that Jack gives him. ]
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[For better or worse. Jack is starting to get antsy, which he's sure that Genji has noticed, despite his best efforts not to betray anything. All the time they spent together as part of COST has thoroughly negated his ability to keep a straight face.
They're used to each other, he's starting to realize.]
I'll let you know if that changes. Now all that's left is to figure out how to spend the time.
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When Jack implies a question, Genji tilts his head to one side, mildly surprised that he's being polled on what their next move should be. Consistent strikes against Talon seems to be a given, so Jack must mean outside of that.
After a brief moment of thought, Genji smiles. ]
I believe I still owe you a lesson in meditation.
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That said, he’s sort of unsure of Genji’s suggestion, even though he knows beggars can’t really be choosers.]
I don’t think I’d be very good at it.
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You realize that is the whole point of practicing, do you not?
[ At least in Genji's case he'd had lessons on mediation even as a child, though he hadn't always paid close attention to them. He'd only truly learned under Zenyatta's tutelage, but that makes him well-equipped to pass the knowledge on now. ]
I think it would be good for you.
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[Of which he has a lot, to the point where he thinks trying to meditate with Genji might be an exercise in futility. They have a lot of time for this right now, but he still doesn't want to waste anyone's time. This might be a losing battle, but he's fairly certain that Genji will see that Jack is going to be tough to crack.]
Too much on my mind.
[He's fairly certain he doesn't need to tell Genji that.]
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[ The stubbornness of Jack Morrison is truly something to behold. Genji has lost count of how many times he's had to engage in arguments like this since he started staying here, and while it's become a point of frustration, he's doing his best to remain patient and understanding. To be like Zenyatta, even though he's not nearly as good at it.
Still, he can rely on his own experience to try and get through to Jack, and that's exactly what he does. After letting out some of his aggravation through an exhale, he turns his attention back to Jack and bares a small bit of his soul. ]
When I first came across Master Zenyatta, I also had much on my mind. I also had issues, as you call them. I was not at peace with myself. I was angry all the time. I could not accept my own body, and it made me lash out at anyone near me. I had not yet forgiven my brother, and thoughts of revenge plagued me every day. Meditation was... only the first step.
[ He wants to help. That is all. He only hopes Jack can see how genuine he is in that desire. ]
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[Jack has too much on his mind to effectively mediate, but meditation is what will get all of it off his mind? He generally thinks of himself as kind of a tough nut to crack, and he doubts this will be an exception.
But it’s not like he has anything better to do. He knows that Genji’s “master”, as he describes him, must’ve had some kind of positive effect on him—the Genji he met in COST is certainly not the angry, tormented cyborg he once knew in Overwatch. So maybe there’s something to all this after all, though Genji seems to be describing a long, arduous path of personal growth, one that Jack isn’t sure he can commit to when there’s so much else to get done.]
He really worked wonders for you, huh?
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But it isn't much of a surprise that Jack wishes to know more about Zenyatta. Genji recognizes that this is a way for Jack to get the subject off of him, and it ultimately won't work, but he'll humor him for now. ]
Yes, he did.
[ He bobs his head, a brief nod. ]
I owe him much. My life, even. Were it not for him, I wouldn't be the man I am today. If I can pass on anything he did for me to you in turn, I'd be glad for it.
[ But Jack has to meet him if not in the middle, then at least a short way down the road. ]
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Where is he now?
[Jack is loath to bring another unrelated party into this, but it seems strange to him that Genji would choose to seek Jack out instead of, presumably, continuing to travel with Zenyatta.]
Does he know you're here?
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No, he's still in Nepal for now. He's aware that I had a journey to take, and loose ends to tie up, but none of the exact details.
[ Genji will ultimately return to Zenyatta and tell him all about COST and what he experienced with them, but it had important to him to track Jack down first. ]
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But these are silly, paranoid thoughts. He tries to shake them off.]
As long as he doesn’t come looking.
[Jack offers Genji something of a lopsided grin, an attempt to play it off as a joke, even if there are real anxieties underneath it.]
Did you tell him about COST?
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While I can hardly control what he does, I doubt he would come after me without making some kind of contact first. You can rest easy.
[ As wise as Zenyatta is, he hasn't had much experience in the larger world. He doesn't have the kind of street smarts that would allow him to track the two of them to this location, even if that was his wish.
At the question, Genji shakes his head. ]
Not yet, though I'd like to. Telling someone else about it would allow it to feel less like a dream, I think.
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[He really has no choice but to believe Genji, but he supposes it’s all beside the point anyway. The point is that now they’re talking about COST, which is simultaneously relieving and not. It’s good to have someone who shares the experience, but having been pulled away from his own world once, a part of Jack will always be wondering if it will happen again.
He sighs a little, scrubbing a hand through his hair, betraying that slight apprehension.]
I thought it was a dream, when I got back.
[Sometimes he wishes it was. He thinks sometimes he’s better off not knowing about COST, the Regency…any of it.]
Until you got in touch with me, I guess.
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[ Genji also feels some measure of relief that he's not somehow the only one who remembers, that he can compare notes about this shared experience that most of the people of this world could never truly comprehend or believe.
Zenyatta would. He knows that deep into his bones (what's left of them). But Zenyatta isn't like most people.
A pause, and Genji studies Jack's face with a hint more interest. ]
And you? Have you told Ana of it?
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Ana already thinks I’m crazy.
[For his crusade against Talon, which often feels less like making progress and more like a dog chasing a car. Even Jack doesn’t know what he’ll do when he finds what he needs. Sometimes it feels like Ana is coming along out of pity, more than anything. A last-ditch effort to keep him from killing himself, even as he drags them further and further past the point of no return. To say he feels guilty about it is an understatement—he can’t, in good conscience, burden her with anything else.]
I’ll tell her. [Maybe.] Just not sure how, yet.
[How to do it without worrying her, that is.]
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Granted, most people would hear something like "I got kidnapped to fight in a galactic time-traveling war" and assume the story-teller had lost some of their grip on their sanity. There was an implicit trust between Jack and Ana that Genji had assumed would overwrite that, but again, it's possible things have changed. ]
I can help. [ There's a smile in his voice, hidden under the ever-present metallic hum. ] If both of us are telling her the same thing, I think it would be more difficult for her to write it off, don't you?
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She'll just think we're both crazy.
[Though that part is said as a joke. It would certainly give her a moment of pause, if the two of them sat her down and told the same story, though he's not sure if she'd ever fully believe it. If it hadn't happened to him, he's not sure he would believe it either.]
Better to focus on the mission here.
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If that's what you wish, then I will abide by that.
[ Genji lets out a long sigh and then stretches his arms up into the air, working the kinks out of both his organic and synthetic parts. The work on his sword is done, so he sheathes it. ]
Do you wonder sometimes? What those people we met through COST are doing now.
[ It's a strange thing, knowing that there's very little chance they'll see any of them again. ]
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[Perhaps in earlier years, he might not be so confident in Genji’s ability to keep something secret, especially from Ana, but he hopes their shared experience means they have a particularly unique bond. Jack feels silly for thinking of it as a bond, but that’s what it is, isn’t it? He takes a long moment to look Genji up and down, as if assessing their newfound friendship (???) for the first time.
He catches himself staring and turns away again, finding a particularly interesting spot on the floor.]
Sometimes.
[He does his best not to focus on it, because he’s back to his own mission.]
You wonder if we’ll ever see any of them again?
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He frowns to himself, not sure what that just was, but the conversation moves on before he can decide whether or not it would be wise to comment on it.
At the question he lets out a long sigh. While he would like to be hopeful, he realizes there's no point in giving Jack anything other than the honest truth. He leans back on his hands and crosses his legs before answering. ]
Only if COST were to recruit all of us again. It seems unlikely that anyone would be able to find their way to this world at the correct time. Or that we could do the same.
[ The entire experience will fade away into some odd chapter of their respective histories, an excursion that would be almost impossible to describe to anyone who hadn't experienced it themselves. ]
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[Jack's thoughts are very similar--that with no way of even communicating with COST, they're never going to see or hear from any of them again. That's for the best, he thinks, though it's going to be difficult to get it out of his head. Perhaps Genji feels the same.]
Not much point in dwelling on it.
[Though of course that's easier said than done, given the fact that COST itself expanded his worldview to include entire universes and infinite timelines. Not something he can shake off very easily.]
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I don't believe that forgetting it ever happened is the correct path. It happened to us and affected us, and there's nothing wrong with thinking of those people we met and befriended during that time.
[ Genji glances up from his lap to watch Jack once he finishes speaking. He suspects that Jack will claim he didn't befriend anyone, that it had all been professional, but that seems doubtful. Even just using the two of them as an example, that time with COST forged a closer bond between them, didn't it? Genji feels that it did, and the sheer fact that Jack has let him stay here says a lot. ]
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[He's not going to admit that anyone there was a friend, and of course he isn't going to just forget everything that happened, but he knows that he easily gets bogged down in the past. Perhaps this is just his way of resolving to move forward.]
It's just tough getting back to business here, while all that's on my mind.
[He's sure Ana has noticed.
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how many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man
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